A Poem a Day: a Series – Day 190

Day 190: “Therapy Wins”

Historically

I’ve felt embarrassed when I cry in front of others

Especially people I don’t know well…

Or at all

But tonight

I cried

I cried

And I cried

In front of people

I spoke and shared what I wanted to

With tears in my eyes

And a frog in my throat

I didn’t know I’d be so emotional!

But I shared

And I cried

And I cried

And I cried

I felt what I needed to

And I didn’t feel embarrassed

I didn’t feel judged

By others

But that wasn’t the point

I didn’t judge myself

Another win from therapy

A Poem a Day: a Series – Day 187

Day 187: “Waiting Game”

Why are we constantly in a waiting game?

Waiting for this to happen so I can finally make that change and be fulfilled

I blame society

For needing money and stability

But I really want to just say fuck it

And live the life of my dreams

What if I don’t have to wait?

Maybe what’s really holding me back is fear

A Poem a Day: a Series – Day 186

Day 186: “The Movies”

We come to this place

To be transported

Another place

Another time

Another version of ourselves

We have aspirations

Fears

Laughs

We want to see play out

We push the button

Put our feet up

And relax into 2 hours of large-screen hilarity

Or passion

Or terror

Or whatever most excites us

We gawk at the previews

Planning our next move

Excited to see what our neighbor deems unwatchable

The lights dim

The movie starts

We’ll exit once the sun goes down

A Poem a Day: a Series – Day 184

Day 184: “Growing Up”

I remember

When the days were simpler

When my hands were smaller

When my eyes were bigger

I remember

When my heart beat faster

When the stars shone brighter

When the world fit into my small town

When I carried more

Felt less

When my fluttering heart couldn’t take much more

When my shoulders slumped

And my head fell

When I didn’t know what I’m worth

When I smiled more

When I pushed myself aside

for the greater good

for the greater god

Now

Shoulders back

My head sits higher

I feel

And only carry what I need

I put stuff down

Run carefree

I breathe

I’ve learned to jump

And fly

And listen to me

I feel my power

Know within

What a joy it is

to grow up

A Poem a Day: a Series – Day 183

Day 183: “New Leaf”

Staring out the window

On a long ride

Wondering about the future

Wondering when it’s time

Tired

Beaten down

When is it time

To get out of town

To drive away

Start another

Start again

Leave it all behind

Riding steady

Build the life I want

Brick by brick

Open up

Turn the page

Write a new chapter

Begin again

I guess I don’t have to wait

A Poem a Day: a Series – Day 182

Day 182: “Thinker”

Sometimes you have to look at it from the outside

Ask for help

Travel around the edges of the problem

Searching for a crack,

A crevice,

You can sneak through

Sometimes consulting someone else

Is enough to spot the space

Where you can shimmy in

And make a change

And sometimes

It’s even easier than you thought

A Poem a Day: a Series – Day 181

Day 181: “Creative Process”

I feel it

Tingling

I have an idea

I’ll sit with it

I’ll think

I’ll think

And I’ll think

And I’ll think

Then I might write something down

The remnants

The outskirts

Of the idea

Nothing fully developed

Not committing

Not wedded to anything

Not far enough to know if it sucks

Or if it’s brilliant

I’ll live in that space

The in-between

Just starting to form the ball

Kneading it

And kneading it

Until it’s overworked

Cracked and dry

Then I’ll stop thinking

Move on

Never even turning the oven on

Until another idea wriggles itself free

And into my line of sight